Why Do I Want To Break Things When I’m Angry?

Why Do I Want To Break Things When Im Angry

Have you ever broken something because you were angry or frustrated? If yes, then you probably don’t want to hear this next part. Breaking things is bad for your health. In fact, it can cause serious injury or even death.

There are many reasons why you might break things when you get angry. For example, you might smash a glass coffee table because you’re mad at your boss. Or maybe you throw a chair across the room because you’re upset with your spouse.

Breaking things is dangerous. It can hurt other people and damage property. And it’s not worth it. Instead, try to control your anger before you act out.

How To Prevent Angry Outbursts

How To Prevent Angry Outbursts

  1. Take deep breaths. Deep breathing calms you down and helps you relax.
  2. Talk about what makes you angry. You may feel better if you know how you got so upset in the first place.
  3. Think of an alternative way to solve your problem. Maybe there’s another solution that doesn’t involve breaking anything.
  4. Tell yourself “I will not hit/throw/break.” Repeat this statement as often as needed until you calm down.
  5. Make sure you have someone who cares about you nearby. A friend or family member can help you keep your cool. For insights on nurturing supportive relationships, read Rediscovering Joy: Revitalizing Mental Health in Retirees.
  6. Get some exercise. Exercise releases stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol. This helps you stay calm.
  7. Go outside. Nature has been proven to be beneficial for both physical and mental well-being.
  8. Meditate. Meditation is a great way to clear your mind and focus on relaxing.
  9. Spend time with loved ones. Spending quality time with those you love helps ease tension and frustration.
  10. Give yourself permission to express your feelings. Sometimes we need to vent our frustrations by talking about them. Don’t worry about hurting others’ feelings. They’ll understand.
  11. Avoid alcohol and drugs. These substances make you more likely to lose control and act irrationally.
  12. Be careful around sharp objects. Sharp objects such as knives, scissors, pencils, and pens can easily cut or stab you.
  13. Stay away from hot surfaces. Hot surfaces such as stoves, ovens, and fireplaces can burn you.
  14. Keep your hands busy. Holding a pen, phone, or any object can distract you from feeling anxious or stressed.
  15. Eat healthy foods. Foods high in protein and fiber like chicken, fish, eggs, beans, nuts, and fruit promote good moods.
  16. Drink plenty of water. Water keeps you hydrated and helps flush toxins from your body.
  17. Find ways to relieve stress. Some people find relief through exercise, meditation, yoga, or spending time outdoors. Others prefer to unwind with a favorite hobby or pastime.
  18. Listen to music. Music has been shown to reduce anxiety and increase relaxation.
  19. Use humor. Humor is a great way to lighten up tense situations.
  20. Sleep enough. Lack of sleep causes irritability, which leads to anger.
  21. Remember to breathe deeply. Breathing slowly and deeply reduces stress and increases energy levels.
  22. Smile. Smiling improves your outlook and boosts your immune system.
  23. Volunteer. Volunteering gives you something positive to do and lets you interact with others.
  24. Watch funny movies. Watching comedy relieves stress because it reminds us of fun times.
  25. Write down your thoughts. Writing down your thoughts helps clarify your thinking and prevents rambling.

Why Do We Feel The Urge To Destroy Things When Angry?

Why Do I Want To Break Things When I’m Angry?

When we become angry, we often feel the urge to destroy things. Why does this happen?

  1. Our brains release adrenaline — a hormone associated with fear and aggression — when we get angry. Adrenaline makes us more aggressive and less likely to take action. To understand the science behind anger and its manifestations, read Why do I shake when I’m mad? Understanding the science behind anger tremors.
  2. When we’re angry, we tend to focus on the negative aspects of an event rather than all its good points. We can easily overlook the positive side of a situation.
  3. When we’re angry we frequently act impulsively. We might throw a punch without considering the consequences.
  4. When we’re angry our bodies produce cortisol, a chemical linked to stress. Cortisol makes us feel tired and sluggish.
  5. When we’re angry there’s little room left in our brain for other activities like reasoning and problem-solving.

What Activities Release Frustration And Anger?

Anger can be released in many ways. Here are some examples:

  1. If someone cuts you off in traffic, you may want to yell at him. But if you don’t have anything else better to do, you could also just sit quietly and think about how rude he was.
  2. You may be tempted to pick up a heavy object and smash it against a wall. However, if you choose instead to go outside and play basketball with friends, you’ll probably feel happier afterward.
  3. If you’ve had a bad day at work, you may want to vent your frustration by yelling at your boss. But if you decide to write a letter to your supervisor explaining what happened, you may feel much better afterward.
  4. If you’re upset that you didn’t win an award, you may want to shout out loud at the person who gave it to you. But if you decide instead to call the winner to congratulate them, you may feel better afterward.
  5. If you’re frustrated because you can’t remember where you put something, you may want to scream at yourself. But if you decide not to worry about it anymore, you may feel better after calming down.
  6. If you’re upset about having to pay a parking ticket, you may want to break the meter or vandalize the car. But if you decide that you’ll pay the fine later, you may feel better.
  7. If you’re mad at your partner for being late, you may want to slam the door in his face. But if you decide you’d rather talk about why he was late, you may feel better afterward.
  8. If you’re annoyed that your friend is always getting into trouble, you may want to hit her head against a wall. But if you decide she needs to learn from her mistakes, you may feel better later.
  9. If you’re angry at your children for misbehaving, you may want to punish them physically. But if you decide they need to understand the importance of following rules, you may feel better when they apologize.
  10. If you’re disappointed that you lost a game, you may want to throw your controller across the room. But if you decide it would be more fun to watch TV, you may feel better once the anger has passed.


To conclude, anger isn’t always bad; sometimes it’s just part of life.

In order to stop breaking things when you are angry you should learn to manage your anger by consuming with an anger management therapist or implementing your own steps for self-care and prevention. For more information on managing emotions, visit How to email a therapist for the first time.

About our Author Michelle Landeros, LMFT license# 115130
Author: Michelle Landeros, LMFT

Michelle Landeros is a Licensed Marriage Family Therapist (LMFT). She is passionate about helping individuals, couples and families thrive.

Last updated: July 13, 2024